We’re in Las Vegas. We don’t gamble. We don’t know if Brundlefly would enjoy gambling but we’re not going to give her any opportunities to find out.

We’re at an RV park less than three miles off the Strip, where it’s much quieter and much less bright, even taking into account the garishly-lit color-changing hotel and casino just next door. I’m doing laundry this morning, finding the washer and dryer prices to be relatively inexpensive considering where we are. We did the food shopping yesterday and found the same thing, to be true most especially at the Trader Joe’s.

I heart Trader Joe’s.

We have access to the casino with all its amenities while we’re staying at the park. There’s a bowling alley here, a movie theater, and an atrium within the casino hotel that houses a fiberglass waterfall amid a desert oasis, complete with animatronic animals of the American Southwest. It’s actually quite beautiful, for all of its artifice, and we enjoyed strolling through it during the evening. I look forward to discovering and re-discovering such little pockets of wonder in the other larger hotels out on the Strip during our stay.

I have been to Las Vegas before. Anaphys is here for the first time. I have been in and out of shows on the Strip with friends, who were both on and off the stage, but have never actually had the autonomy with my time and movement that I do on this particular trip. For the first time I am not desperately needing to raise capital to finance any debts or obligations. I am also able to pick and choose where to go and how long to spend there. Most importantly, I am able to begin figuring out for myself this place called Las Vegas, and from the viewpoint of a trailerite, it promises to be fascinating.

We had dinner at the casino buffet last evening (mistake … especially with the unadvertised MSG headache for dessert … ) and will be looking much more carefully at our dining options for the afternoons and evenings we are away from the Airstream. We have two guidebooks that give us prices and styles of cuisine to pore over and between them we can make some educated choices. There is wonderful good, fresh, whole food to be had even at places that ask you how many you are when you walk in, and we will find them while we’re here. There’s a sushi place in a diner shell that looks fascinating all on its own and we may swing by there after the weekend to see what it’s all about.

There are shows to be seen, most of which we cannot afford this trip, and many that are free for the watching if you know where to go and when to go there. We are even more enthused about things like museums, amusement parks, Red Rock Canyon and the Sekhmet Temple in the desert, things many people visiting Vegas don’t consider especially worthy attractions, which is a shame, really. The Natural History Museum has a display up on bioluminescence right now that I am really excited about seeing, maybe even a bit more than the dinosaurs, which is saying a LOT for those of you who know me.

For the most part, I think we’ll be spending our time taking in the energy and atmosphere that is Las Vegas in the 21st Century and examining the major changes that are present. It sure isn’t what it was even in the 1990’s. There are far less people here for one thing. The casinos aren’t as loud when you walk through them. The noise used to be consistent, muffled and earthquake-y in its intensity. Now it’s simply a low-grade annoyance, like a neighbor in the apartment upstairs with the stereo up too loud. Even Anaphys, never having been here before, can sense that the energy level isn’t at all what it was, and that’s saying something.

We’ll be taking in a Vegas Vortex event for a while on Saturday and seeing what the energy level there is like. It has been many years since I’ve visited with Fire Tribe friends and family out here and I’m letting go of expectations about what I’ll find at this weekend’s goings–on. Here’s hoping the energy is still radiant and inclusive, though I’ve heard from more than a few people that even these events are not what they were in the last decade. It will be interesting for me to walk back into an environment of bliss and personal alchemical change having done so much changing myself these past few years. I wonder what I’ll find there, but I wonder what I’ll find within myself even more as I experience it.

The Strip will be the litmus test, with all the lights and splendor that go along with it. I’ve never felt overwhelmed by it, but I have held a sense of wonder and respect for the sheer size and spectacle of it all, which is a completely different experience up close and live than it is looking at it on a television screen or the Internet. I wonder how different it will feel to me now, under the circumstances of my visit, with the experiences I now have behind me in life. I’ve never fit into the culture here even in my twenties. Now that I’m nearing 40 the advertising lets me know that I’m even farther from belonging than before. Not that I mind. The culture here, for me, was one to be looked at and studied and sometimes appreciated, but never something in which to participate. The cultures at a level or two of remove, like the Vegas Vortex, are where I seemed to fit well before, but that is changing also.

The freedom of being a trailerite opens up new ways of looking at one’s self and presents opportunities for restacking priorities in a rapid and practical manner. It becomes obvious what is important in one’s life, and, more tellingly, what isn’t. Being in Vegas throws into sharp focus a lot of what we are told is important and what our priorities should be, but it is a hollow sort of endorsement this time around and it is difficult not to see that the Emperor is more naked than Brundlefly. The big influx of money is dwindling and I’m not sure this city knows how to survive on a trickle. Unlike us, it is unsuited to boondocking, and this is where I’m feeling a genuine sense of my own power. I’ll never gamble with the high rollers, but I consider what I have in life far to precious to risk. Its conservation, stability and future are all important to me, and I suppose that is what makes all the difference.